No need to worry—Lindsay Lohan is reporting live from Hurricane Sassy Sandy…

As Frankenstorm continues to come to life, which could affect up to 60 million people, Lindsay Lohan doesn’t seem to be phased in the slightest. That said, we can all find some comfort in knowing that LiLo is there—in the thick of things. No, no, not because we hope she is whisked far far away…how cruel!

But, because LiLo’s NO FEAR (aka ‘Ignorance is Bliss’) attitude will come in handy if things get hairy out there. She’ll have fearlessly take to Twitter to report blow-by-blow details that are highly uninformed—like this one that she fired off last night:

“WHY is everyone in SUCH a panic about hurricane (i’m calling it Sally)..? Stop projecting negativity! Think positive and pray for peace.”

We weren’t aware that positive affirmations work on violent weather patterns?? Did you notice how Lindz couldn’t even be bothered to call the storm by ONE of its actual nick-names—Frankenstorm, Hurricane Sandy…did we miss any?

Lindsay is said to be taking the storm so lightly that she’s decided to dress up for Halloween as “Sexy Storm Sassy.” ‘Sassy’ is what Lindsay later dubbed the devastating storm, which naturally ‘took off on Twitter,’ and even spawned a Wikipedia page, which seems to have since been deleted (thank god).

Guess this is the EXTRA EXTRA kind of nonsense that occurs when your publicist quits…